Living OUTSIDE the [box]

Yesterday I was in my human sexuality class, and we we're discussing gender roles, and society's view's of how a man and woman should operate. Both individually and collectively.

I live outside the box. Completely. Even after I've stepped out the box, I've walked as far away from the box as possible. Anything that's conventional, I try and stay away from. I have a cornucopia of thing's I want for myself, and thing's that I have issues with. I know, I am not the traditional 'stereotypical' woman. I know this. I'm 100% fine with this too.

'Women, should stay home, and raise the kids. Their place in society, is to be a man's backbone. Women cannot be strong, they should not do anything, that takes away from their femininity. Their not allowed to have their own feelings, wants, ideas. They should be submissive, and be obedient to their man.'

These are some, of the many idea's of what a woman should be. Yes, they've changed over the years, but for the most part, they are still the same. What have you heard? How have any of these stereotypes made you feel if you are a woman? I know when I hear how I 'should' act because of my gender, It drives me up the wall. Who's idea's are these? Their certainly NOT mine.

Does me not being sure if I want to get married, make me less of a woman? Because I have second thoughts on having children, does that make me a bad seed? I want to have my own place, long before a man ever moves in, does that make me a misfit? Is it wrong to want the same thing's society has told men their allowed to have? I want to be CEO of my own corporation, can I not be, because of my gender?

Then if we also analyze what a man should be like, we get:

'Men should go out and work, to provide for their families. Their strong, and protective by nature. They are head of the households. Their macho, and should not possess' any feminine traits. Men should not cry. Men are allowed to be as promiscuous as they want, it is rewarded.'

If you're a man, how have some of these stereotypes made you feel? Do you find yourself agreeing with the above? Crying is a normal expression, that our males are taught to repress. Aren't we all exposed to a lot of the same situations? When something is sad, we cry. Why should our men, feel embarrassed to express a normal emotion, that we ALL feel?

If my spouse's Mom, or best friend we're to past, should he feel like he can't cry? Should he not express his fears, and concerns to me, because that would take away from his protective nature? If I want to defend my man's honor, should he feel less of a man, because I want to speak up in the same way he does for me? Should my husband, be any less connected to our children (if we had them)then I do? YEAH RIGHT.

A lot of people, fall prey to society's rules, and depictions of how things are supposed to go. Sometimes our minds have become programed to this, that we don't realize it's been done. We are products of society. Honestly, we are. Any thought, that is put out in the media, is a thought that they want us to share. It's subliminal messaging at it's best. Yet, their extremely good at it. They play off our emotions, off of our need to fit in.

WHY DO WE WANT TO FIT IN? Why is it more encouraged to fit in, rather than stand out amongst the crowd? I've always been different. I enjoy reading, and I have done so in crowds of people, who are screaming, laughing, etc, and in the midst of all their conversations, you can find my lost in my book, and depending on what's happening I may even be crying, if it's sad. I can get lost in whatever I love, and not be afraid to stand out amongst the masses. Yet, this isn't encouraged.

Let's analyze some of the social networks, mainly twitter. It is another need to fit in. I'm on twitter, and I do it also. If a show is on, we ALL have to be tweeting about it. It let's everyone know that we're all watching the same things. Do we watch because we want to? or is it because we want to be able to join the conversation about it? Is it a little of both? Why do we have the need, to be so connected, with everyone? This post is more of a food for thought. I ask you to think about all the idea's I've presented here.

WE hold the power. Yet, do we feel like it? We control the way corporations run, and yet we aren't entitled to anything for it. Is something wrong with this? Anything that is advertised on TV, is put out there for us to buy. If we didn't what would they do?

I'm going to leave you with this: I AM NOT AFRAID TO LIVE OUTSIDE OF THE BOX. I'm having so much more fun, standing out, that I don't think I ever want to fit in.

More food for thought: The most successful people, always tell stories, of them never fitting in. So, I ask you one more time, WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO FIT IN?