OCD Lotto Dreamer...

Unless you're close to me, you probably don't know I'm an obsessive lotto dreamer. It all started when my father was dropping me home one brisk sunday morning. Almost two years to this date. Before I continue, you need to know my dad is Trinidadian. If you're west indian, you know that means he's hard working. He works more then he sleeps, and he's great at it. My father never takes a day off, even when he's off. His spare time consists of rebuilding cars from the ground up. This is why I work so hard, I can't ever say I'm tired, when I see my dad wake up at 5am, even when it's sunday. Anyway, the mega millions had to be something like $178m. Ok, so that's a lot of money, that you're getting for free.  I mean after taxes, you're still walking away with about $111m.

"What would you do if you won?" The question I'm sure all of us have the answers to. I live in NYC, the city built on the hard work of those hustling and bustling. Do we even sleep? No, because most people can't afford to sleep. No matter how much you travel now, you know eventually you have to go back to work.

"Pay off all my debt." After student loans and a few other things, that would be about $60k.  

"I'd travel for a year straight, and bring WAWA to NY. I don't know if you've ever been to WAWA, but its the shxt, and their hoagies are literally to die for. I'd take the annuity, and live month to month, and not have a care in the world. My mom would have her dream restaurant, my father could finally rest, and travel. Can you imagine if you didn't have to work for anyone? If you could have the money to fund your own dreams? To do whatever your heart imagines? Yeah.... you see how passionate I am? lol.

After this conversation, I told myself, I'd only be working for a short period of time. I was going to play the lotto everyday until I won. I had my mind set, that I was destined to win, because everything I was going to do with the money was that important. Can someone say delusional? I didn't stop doing my regular day to day, but as I worked, and studied to better myself, for myself, my lotto dreams grew stronger. My dad had found over 50 lotto tickets in my draw, and sat me down for an intervention.

"Ariel, you need to stop playing the lotto. This is getting out of hand. It's all you're thinking about, and that's not healthy."

  In my defense, it wasn't like it was 1000 lotto tickets. The slogan 'A dollar & a dream' had definitely worked on me. They'd reeled me in, what could I say? I knew I had to stop, when my cousin recapped on a drunk night we had at a bar.  It was a monday karaoke night, supposedly I got so drunk, and told the bartender I was going to win the lotto, and come back and buy the bar out. (embarrassed face) It's funny recalling this, because I was so far gone.The problem wasn't in playing the lotto, the problem was me actually believing I was already a winner. I would speak it into existence, that in my mind, I only had one more day of work, only one more day to live this ordinary life.

I have been so scared to play the lotto, because of how OCD I know I can get. I don't want to get reeled in again. The power is at $206m, and I know, I know, I probably won't win, but can't a girl dream??To be debt free? to Travel all over this beautiful world? to shop til I literally dropped... To take care of my family? To invest, and have my money make money... To not have to be apart of this rat race.... Oh can a girl dream?!

I'm dreaminggggg, lol. I'm not going to get to that point I was at before. I promise. Well I'll try not to ;). Happy lotto dreaming guys!


<333

--A